Split Screen: Bromance and Broken Bones

Hello there, Split Screen readers! Are you ready to get your bro on? Prepare yourself for the worst way to handle a confusing crush ever on Coffee Prince, and the power of bros of all shapes and sizes on My Hero Academia. You ready bro? Let’s bro.

(New to Split Screen? You can find the whole archive here!)

Coffee Prince Ninth Cup (up to minute 31)

M: Bros will be bros, am I right?

E: Just bro things like calling each over just for the heck of it, giving each other earrings, being each other’s first kiss…that’s what bros do.

M: Bros can be soft, I guess. 

E: Oh yeah, bros can be bros in whatever way works for the bros, but not when you’re using it as an unhealthy coping mechanism. Bros is about healthy mutual support.

M: Coffee Prince is missing a lot of that in the shop right now. 

E: This coffee shop…it’s falling apart. They are having some communication issues.

M: That’s what happens when you keep secrets. 

E: Ha-rim is the only employee, minus of course Han-gyul, who does not know about Eun-chan. Not for lack of trying on Sun-ki’s part.

M: Sun-ki is screaming that she’s a girl at every possible moment. 

“she gurl”

E: I do think we have to be reaching some sort of breaking point on the whole girl thing sometime soon. I don’t think I can take the bro thing for more than the rest of this episode.

M: I’ll bet the bro thing ends with everyone beating each other up like bros. But I think Eun-chan being a girl probably holds until the mid-season mark. 

E: How many episodes is this, anyway?

M: It is seventeen episodes. I take it back! The mid-season finale was the kiss. 

E: That does make sense as a midseason finale though.

M: Wow, when we started the episode you were like “episode nine! We’re really moving through this!” and I laughed at you. But you were right after all.

E: I didn’t know how many episodes it was then either, so you were right to laugh at me. 

M: I can’t think about the bro thing anymore, but the alternative is talking about Yoo-joo and Han-sung

E: We can come back to our favorite least favorite couple. We did have a lot of drama with the coffee shop crew from learning a little more about Ha-rim’s situation, to Sun-ki potentially tracking down his daughter and sliding under a car. 

real bro things

M: Sun-ki almost died. 

E: I don’t think the answer, when a car is coming at you, is to slide to the ground to make it easier for the car to run you over. 

M: It would have made a little sense if he was trying to stop that car. But it was just a random car, and that was probably just a random woman anyway.

E: I suppose we’ll find out next time because he did call to find the location for that kindergarten. So, can’t wait for him to get arrested basically.

M: He’s going to abduct a random child. 

E: He and Min-yup are also at odds over Eun-sae right now. Mostly from Min-yup’s side, because Sun-ki is preoccupied with his potential daughter.

M: Min-yup is going through a hard time. I am proud of him for standing up for himself and then channeling his frustration into brisk exercise. 

E: It’s a healthy outlet. At least he didn’t jump out of a two-story window.

M: What is this, Shawshank Redemption?

E: Despite all the conflict, the cleaning scene and the random dancing were some fun stuff this episode.

M: Another fun day on set! Let’s clean!

E: Let’s clean this set which we made dirty just for you.

M: Ha-rim’s assassin family really wanted him to better himself in med school. Now, he’s a barista. 

E: Doctor, barista, both equally good professions for assassination, to be honest. 

M: Both afford you pretty easy access to murder, you’re right. 

E: And someone might be getting murdered by the end of this episode with how everybody was when we left them.

M: Min-yup hates Sun-ki, Sun-ki gets in a traffic accident, everyone hates the bros, Yoo-joo almost threw herself out the window again…

E: I cannot fault her for just wanting out.

Go Yoo-joo go!!

M: They’re going to end up together. The last episode will be the Yoo-sung wedding. 

E: Oh yeah, I’m pretty sure they’ll be an endgame relationship. I was thinking that I would be more invested in this if their plot from the first few episodes had happened prior to the start of the series, and they were just a mostly functional relationship at the start that starts to reveal its cracks as the story goes along. But I’m not sure why the series expects me to think that their relationship could ever be solid when it was so dramatic at the beginning.

M: But see, now they can joke about how they’ve both cheated on each other! 

E: See, but they could still do that, but I would have had a few episodes to be invested in them. You know?

M: Yoo-joo deserves better. Han-sung should end up alone. 

E: Yoo-joo just kidnaps Sweeper, and they drive off into the sunset together. The true happy ending.

M: If only. With a few pastries from the cafe. 

E: A kiwi waffle.

M: It would probably be good with some whipped cream. Kiwi on top, to be clear, not in the waffle. 

E: It’s just a very specific fruit. I usually think strawberries or blueberries or even, like, cherries…but kiwi? It does not immediately jump out as a waffle fruit.

M: What you’re forgetting is that Sun-ki is from Japan. 

E: Ah, yes, where everybody is free to love each other and eats kiwi waffles.

M: This episode ended with a real teaser, huh? Who’s the mystery man?

E: We’re still not 100% clear on exactly what Han-gyul’s family situation is either. I wonder if the guy is like the mistress’s husband? 

awkward convo with the daddio

M: That feels too far-fetched to me. Especially since it seems possible that Han-gyul was born before his dad was married.

E: The mystery man was very specifically asking about Han-gyul though, so he has to have something to do with something, right? Maybe his dad also had a “bro.”

M: Maybe he ran the orphanage.

E: Hey, c’mon, get that emotion out of here.

M: Han-gyul probably makes the same bug-eyes face when he’s angry. 

E: You know if Coffee Prince wanted to introduce the huge dramatic stained glass backgrounds, I would be into it. I think it’d really work, you know?

M: It would certainly be a tonal shift

E: Romance tracker? We’ve sort of already touched on it. We’re getting to that point where we were near the end of Boys Over Flowers where the episode discussion is just romance tracker.

M: There is a lot of romance going on. 

E: Just please end the bro thing one way or the other by the end of this episode, please. It is so much.

M: Maybe they’ll all become sworn bros. 

E: I don’t love that.

M: Then it will lose its shine, and everyone will move on. But we’ll get one funny scene where everyone is just like “Bro? Bro. Brooooo.”

E: That’s fair, that’s fine.

My Hero Academia S4E9: “Red Riot”

M: Coffee Prince was all about how bros can be soft. This episode of My Hero was all about how men need to be HARD. 

E: I understand your joke, and I acknowledge it, but also, no it wasn’t.

M: You’re right, men can be FAT too. 

E: Wideload…

M: That’s MASTER Wideload to you! Fatso-SAMA

E: Yeah, so I went through the first part of this season thinking that Fat Gum’s Quirk was a typo, because it’s “Fat Adsorbtion.” In that he takes the power and adds it to his own and then fat comes off…I don’t know, you get it.

M: I get it. I hadn’t noticed it at all, but I get it. 

E: I suppose I am just judgmental and sensitive to typos.

M: It makes sense. He can break down the lipids super fast to get to the energy. That’s chemistry!

E: And now he’s Fit-Gum.

M: He should have a lot of loose skin. 

E: Yeah, add some skin horror to the episode that has Kirishima’s skin flaking off. That’s what this needed.

M: Kirishima is going to be so exfoliated when he relaxes again. 

E: Thanks for pointing out to me that his eyes could flake off too, that was not a thought I had had previously, and I’m just so grateful for it now being in my mind.

M: How does he move his rock eyes? 

E: Slowly.

M: Do you think he could get a mason to do Lasik with a chisel?

E: I don’t think that’s quite how that works.

My face thinking about this topic

M: Another episode mostly sans Deku. Was the voice actor busy or something? 

E: No, that’s just how the material is. This arc so far is pretty full of…character vignettes, I guess? Which is a bit different than how the structure has been so far.

M: I do feel like it’s at a detriment to the momentum. How many Bullets have we discharged now? Like five?

E: I think the one at the door that Dragon Lady and the girls stayed behind to deal with is also a Bullet, so six of eight.

M: Okay, so next episode will be one more vignette with Key Man and a kiddo probably. 

E: I think Deku is the only kiddo left. Mirio went on ahead, Suneater is passed out, and Kirishima is beat up. I guess the girls could catch up.

M: Are there any girls left on the front squad? Is it a boys’ night? A BNO?

E: I think it’s Deku, Keyman, Aizawa, Nighteye and a few cops, so yeah. 

M: Dang. That’s kinda lame. 

E: Just bro things: saving a small child from her abuser. Love to see it.

M: I loved the wholesome yakuza backstory. 

E: Yeah, I like that the old boss seems to be very Yakuza-style yakuza. Overhaul, meanwhile, is no Kiryu.

M: That’s been established. 

E: I did like seeing that Mina was always incredibly cool. Which seemed right.

M: Except now she gets to do nothing cool. 

She prepared Kirishima to take on the punch man

E: She gets to know how to breakdance.

M: Why isn’t that her ultimate move? 

E: You never know, she’s gotta have an inspirational moment and discover Breaker Style.

M: They’ve got to visit Sotenbori. Wait, Kirishima can teach her! He was there!

E: That’s true.

M: I can’t believe Kirishima has been coloring his hair. His iconic red hair. No roots in sight. 

E: He puts up a very meticulous image of himself, basically.

M: Do you think he filed his teeth to look like that too?

E: Maybe, but I think they are just Like That. He probably just hurt himself a lot in his childhood, more than just the cut on his eye. I mean, between his sharp teeth and a lack of control over Hardening.

M: His poor mom. 

E: That would be a very stressful Quirk. To be fair, most of these kids would have very stressful Quirks at five years old. Explosions, acid, being invisible…

M: Do you think she was always invisible? 

E: I’m not sure? Like, is it a trait like Tokoyami’s bird head? Or is it a Quirk that developed at like five? Which is worse? Invisible baby or suddenly your toddler vanishes?

M: What do Tokoyami’s parents look like? 

E: Probably extremely normal. Just the most normal looking people.

M: Just imagine, like…”here’s the head, he’s coming! Push!”

E: Oh god, let’s move on from that.

My face thinking about this topic

M: I’m glad Kirishima doesn’t buy into the All Might fan club. 

E: I do like that the show is talking a little bit about different ways you can be a hero outside the All Might ethos. Sometimes, you don’t “just move” the way that Deku did at the start of the series, right? Sometimes you’re not as reckless as dumb crybaby Deku. But that’s okay, you can still do good.

M: I still think that was an inappropriate gift for an eleven-year-old. That video was frightening. 

E: They didn’t check Common Sense Media.

M: No. 

E: Lawsuit Watch? Villains, but those don’t count. Workplace harassment? 

M: The bro thing was pretty mutual though. 

E: Not many lawsuits this time.

M: Look, Kirishima is now part of a pattern of children getting pretty seriously wounded on this mission. Aizawa could have taken those guys in like two seconds flat. 

E: I don’t know if his Quirk would work against “punches hard”

M: He’d have to try!

E: Fat Gum was trying to handle it himself, to his credit as an adult, I suppose.

M: He kinda encouraged Kirishima to jump back in there though. As his arms were flaking off. 

Skinny Gum

E: Caffeine watch? Punchy man was on some espresso.

M: Yeah, and Mina’s breakdancing is pretty caffeinated. That said, the whole Coffee Prince team could use a nice cup of joe. Maybe they’re just cranky. Under-caffeinated. 

E: I was gonna say, their crankiness was the “Emma at 3 o’clock without coffee variety”

M: Okay, I’m ready for the next title. 

E: Alright, season 4 episode 10 is called “Temp Squad”

M: Oh. They don’t sound qualified. 

E: Overhaul’s army of interns…

M: Do it for the school credit!

E: Okay, no, give me your predictions.

M: Prediction one: man, I have no idea what the temp squad is going to be. I can’t even decide if they’re heroes or villains! 

E: Well, gimme something!

M: Okay, prediction one: two of the bullets are on vacation or busy running their real-estate empire or hostess club or whatever, so we’ve got two substitute Bullets filling in. The Temp Squad. 

E:

M: Prediction two: like I said, this is the episode where Key(blade) Hero One is going to get to shine. He can probably unlock any lock? In addition to something else related. Maybe he can unlock any heart. He’s really good at interrogations. 

E:  

M: Prediction three: Overhaul and Shigaraki have to temporarily work together to escape the compound. Probably Toga will turn up in Deku’s skin for a prank. I dunno how her quirk works, maybe she makes skin suits. 

E:

M: Prediction four: is it obvious yet that I have no idea where this is going? There is no dramatic arc. Aizawa is going to get dry-eye at an inconvenient moment. Okay, he’ll meet the dehydration villain. 

E: .

M: Prediction five: Mirio is just streaking through a hallway somewhere. I know his costume phases with him, but he’s using the element of surprise. 

E:

Hey there everyone! Thanks for watching along with us! We’re watching the MHA dub on Funimation and Coffee Prince on Tubi if you want to catch up now.

And, hey, if you ever find yourself wanting to read My Hero Academia (or Boys Over Flowers for that matter, as a throwback), maybe consider ditching Amazon and finding yourself a local black-owned bookstore or comic shop. If not, find something else that you can do!

Next time! The temp squad roll in, and they do as well as interns could be expected to do, and the bro plot rolls on, despite our strong discomfort.

 

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